I think about adoption all day, everyday. I am constantly looking at my phone to see if I missed a call from our caseworker, at least every 5 minutes. Sometimes it’s so hard to wait that I feel completely handicapped, I literally can’t do anything because I just want it to happen right NOW!!! Over time I have developed a few coping skills to help me while I wait…not all of them are the healthiest way to cope, but if it gets me through the day I will take it.
1. Work…and NEVER call in sick. When I am at work I can’t look at my phone for 12 hours and I am super busy SO I practically am never thinking about adoption, really. When I call in sick, my anxiety increases 10-fold than if it were a regular day off, guilty for calling in sick and anxious as I wait, so I have learned that I just shouldn’t do it.
2. Reading teenage fiction. Currently I am reading The Divergent Series…it really isn’t that good but it’s an easy read and it “diverts” my attention for a little while.
3. Watch re-runs of Star-Trek: The Next Generation. I don’t really have a justification for this one…
4. Incessantly use my Mygrastick. It’s a small roller with lavender and peppermint. I run it across my temples, neck and wrists when I need a “reset”. Each roller has 250 applications, I have to replace mine every seven days.
5. Turn off my cell phone. I used to be all paranoid that if I did this my caseworker won’t be able to get a hold of me when she has a baby ready for me and then she will just move on to the next couple. This doesn’t happen and I don’t turn my phone off long enough anyway, plus they have Doug’s number too.
6. Drink a Dr. Pepper. I don’t even care if soda is bad for my health. I don’t even care if I shouldn’t eat my feelings. Sometimes an ice cold Dr. Pepper (or Mountain Dew) just makes me feel better, even if it’s only for the duration I am actually drinking it.
7. Pandora. Bon Iver radio ALWAYS makes me feel better; I don’t know how I survived without it.
8. Target runs. The way this goes: fill up my cart with EVERYTHING I could possibly want. Then, go around and put everything back. This can waste up to 4 hours on my really bad days.
9. Knit. Especially baby items. I am currently making a mustard yellow sweater dress for a 9 month old.
10. Running, I guess. I am not always motivated to go, but when I do I ALWAYS feel better.
What are your coping skills? For adoption or not. As you can see, I still need more…